For most women, pregnancy is both an exciting and scary journey. Some have it all planned, while others may have evaluated various options before deciding to proceed. Unfortunately, however, some pregnancies come unexpectedly, and not everyone is ready to embrace the life changes that come with it.
If you think you are with a child and are unsure what to do next, you are not alone. According to recent data, there is a surge in unplanned pregnancies, especially during the onset of the pandemic. While no one is truly prepared for parenthood, it is crucial to keep calm and know your options when dealing with such circumstances.
Discuss it with people you trust.
The situation can be overwhelming, especially if you find yourself pregnant at a young age, have underlying medical conditions to consider, or are not entirely ready for the responsibilities of having a baby. But, regardless of the situation, it’s essential not to make hasty decisions.
Instead, make it a point to talk with people who can help and support you in every way. They could be your loved ones, a professional counselor, or your own doctors. Allow yourself to have a safe place to vent your emotions, ideas, beliefs, and responses to your current situation. Then, take this time to weigh your options to know which course to take.
Terminating the pregnancy.
According to studies, forcing women to push through with unwanted pregnancy is found to have a higher risk of psychological distress. In return, this can potentially harm the child’s growth and well-being, leading to dependency, unstable relationships, and violence. Therefore, if you have no plans in keeping the child, you may choose to end it by taking licensed abortion pills or going through a surgical operation.
While both procedures are safe and effective, how far you are from your pregnancy will determine the best process for you. For example, most clinics only allow the procedure for women in their first trimester or up to the 10th week of pregnancy. Thus, communicate this well with your provider.
Moreover, ensure that you follow legal procedures and know the age restriction mandated by your state. For example, some jurisdictions would require minors to acquire parental consent or have their guardians accompany them. Although aborting the child is your choice, it is still possible to experience intense emotional distress.
This is normal and will eventually fade away. However, speaking with specialists may be beneficial, mainly if things go out of hand.
Giving them up for adoption.
Child-rearing is a substantial financial commitment. This includes providing them shelter, food, clothes and meeting their medical and educational needs. These are crucial factors every expecting parent needs to understand and acknowledge before pushing through with the pregnancy.
Of course, reasons vary from person to person. However, if you believe you are incapable of providing them the life they deserve but aren’t comfortable going under the surgical table, placing the baby for adoption is your best course of action. So, make sure to consult with trusted institutions to assist you in finding the ideal family to raise the child.
You may also talk with some friends, relatives, neighbors, and people whom you trust to take care of the child for you. Additionally, you may opt to give your baby to some couple who may have had troubles conceiving. Just make sure to employ the help of a lawyer or a social worker for a smooth process.
Moreover, understand the terms of open and closed adoption. If you want to have nothing to do with the child after giving birth, meaning giving up your visitations, responsibilities, and legal rights, then the latter is the best option for you. On the other hand, if you prefer the exact opposite, look into the open adoption process and ensure an explicit agreement on both parties.
Dealing with surprised pregnancy can be a rollercoaster ride. Although others may have had the same experience, the situation will always be on a case-to-case basis. Therefore, it is crucial to put you and your unborn child’s best interest and avoid getting your opinions clouded by others.
Should you decide on having and raising the baby, it is crucial to surround yourself with the people who genuinely love and care about you. Set your prenatal appointments and take the necessary shots and vitamins recommended by your doctor. Remember that you don’t have to go through all of this alone.
Most importantly, know that whichever decision you arrive, it will not make you a bad mother. At the end of the day, it is your body, and putting both you and your child’s best interest is what’s more important.
